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Nerves

The last two weeks have been crazy with work. My once part time job in which I worked two days a week for 5 hours a day or less is suddenly a five days a week, full day shift job. It’s because the store manager is on holidays and while the boss is away everyone seems to be looking to me to run the store and the massive mid-year sale set-up. I can understand why, I was a manager for 5 years sometimes running much busier stores, but I came back from maternity leave as a simple casual for a reason: to avoid this. This is the cause of my less-frequent posting, but not the cause of my nerves.

I’m nervous because I uploaded my first piece for critique with my writers group. I originally planned to post some of my very best work (the first chapters for Storybook Perfect if you were curious) but didn’t for two reasons. Number one is because I am struggling a bit with revision on Fanta’s story – something’s not clicking right, but I can’t pinpoint it (editing in tiny fragments of time is not helping me either) – and a critique of the early chapters might help me find what I’m missing. Reason number two is because what would I do if my ‘best work’ was torn to shreds?

I know I’m just being paranoid, I mean the work is pretty solid – those opening chapters were enough to get the first agent I approached to ask for my full manuscript, so they can’t be too crappy – but that doesn’t ease the fear that all writers have: that I’m just not good enough.

Funnily enough, even with that thought in the back of my head it doesn’t stop me from uploading other work for critique or from continuing to work on becoming a published author. Even if I worry I ‘might not be good enough’ I’m not going to give up, because you know what? If I’m not good enough now, what’s to say I can’t work hard and eventually be good enough – or better? Anyway, giving up just isn’t my style.

6 Comments


  1. // Reply

    “those opening chapters were enough to get the first agent I approached to ask for my full manuscript, so they can’t be too crappy” – that is FANTASTIC! Most of us don’t even get looked at, let alone asked for more. Doubts be gone!


    1. // Reply

      You’re right, it was a moment of panic I think, but there’s always next meeting. Sadly the full manuscript was passed on, but the agent was good enough to explain what she liked and didn’t like so I was able to work on it. She was a great agent, so I’m hoping to snag her with my second book ;p


  2. // Reply

    You will always have doubts. They’re part of the whole writer thing. But just be careful of deliberately submitting bad work, and never your best. Because there is a tendency to use that as an excuse when you get harsh crits. “Oh, but that was a bad piece. It was only a first draft. My second drafts are better.” You won’t really know that until you put them up. So my recommendation is, always put up your best work. Never waste yours or your critique partners’ time putting up something you already know is bad.
    Merrilee recently posted..The Qwillery: The Qwillery is looking for reviewers!My Profile


    1. // Reply

      I don’t think I could make myself submit anything bad – I’d be too embarrassed to. I can definitely see your point though and can see how people might fall into such a pattern quite easily, thanks for the warning.


  3. // Reply

    I think you’re amazing to even write a book, let alone approach publishers and have it critiqued, edit it, etc… I’m sure your book is/will be amazing. It certainly sound like a process to get to the final finished product. I enjoy reading all about it, it’s fascinating for somene like me that knows nothing about the industry. I’m looking forward to following along on your “journey” 🙂
    MsMandie recently posted..Accept It.My Profile


  4. // Reply

    One of the messages that was reinforced over and over at the Emerging Writers Festival was – don’t let fear stop you. I’m holding onto that and practicing different writing styles and topics on my blog, branching out a bit from my usual topics.
    Marita recently posted..You can’t blog thatMy Profile

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